1. “I’m heading to the Lake”.
Who wants to go sit in an office when the best lake in the country is so close by?
2. “I ate too much Superman Ice Cream.”
Superman Ice Cream is a Michigan fave. These layers of blue, yellow and red are hard to resist.
3. “There’s a BIG football game on today.”
If it’s Michigan State vs. Michigan in anything, Michiganders are probably going to find a way to watch it.
4. “I have to go and kick some Ohio butt.”
The rivalry between Michigan and Ohio is well documented. Michigan knows it’s better, though.
5. “I was at the brewery too late last night.”
Michigan has one of the best craft brew scenes in the nation. Often, it’s hard to pull yourself away.
6. “I have to host a fish fry.”
People in Michigan know that a good fish fry is perhaps the best way to spend a Friday afternoon.
7. “Hunting season starts tomorrow.”
The opening day of hunting season just might be the most missed day of the year in Michigan, especially in the U.P.
8. “There’s too much road construction.”
We’ve heard it all before – two seasons: Winter and road construction. Due to the harsh winters, they’re ALWAYS working on the roads in Michigan.
9. “I’m on a Euchre roll.”
Though your boss would certainly sympathize, this excuse might get you in hot water. But it’s so tempting.
10.”I can’t get across the bridge.”
The Mackinac Bridge is a beast to cross when the weather is rough. This excuse might actually get you a day off.
11. “I ate a bad pasty.”
Pasties are Michigan’s favorite treat, especially in the U.P. It’s hard to get a bad pasty, but if the meat is old, you could get sick in theory.
12. “I’ll be late. I have to return my cans first.”
Cans and bottles are found money in Michigan. Those who plan ahead know the best times to turn them in to avoid long lines like on Saturday morning.
13. “Let me drink a Vernor’s and then see how I feel.”
Michiganders know that Vernors Ginger Ale is a special concoction that remarkably cures minor ills and hangovers.
14. “I got kidnapped by a troll.”
People in the lower peninsula are jokingly called ‘trolls’ because they live under the Mackinac Bridge.
Okay, so this probably won’t work. But it might buy you some time.
15. “I got kidnapped by a Yooper.”
Okay, that might actually happen.
16. “I got kidnapped in Detroit.”
Good luck with that one.
17. “I’m buried up to my roof in snow.”
Michigan gets a ton of snow, but they’re a hardy bunch. If there isn’t a foot on the ground, this excuse might not fly.
18. “I hit a deer.”
Each year, there are nearly 50,000 reported vehicle-deer crashes in Michigan. About 80 percent of these crashes occur on two-lane roads between dusk and dawn.
19. “We’re going to Cedar Point.”
Everyone in Michigan knows this place is better than Disneyland. It’s worth getting a glare from the boss to take the kids on a weekday, right?
20. “I twisted my ankle sledding.”
This happens a lot, so you’ll probably get a pass on it. Better limp next time you show back up to work, though.